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Disclaimer: I own no one. They are all the property of Joss Whedon.
Author's Note: Aside from that, I suppose this story and the ones that will follow it require some explanation. As of the episode, “Expecting,” I have decided it might be fun to write down journal entries the way I imagine Cordelia would write them. There will be at least one to mark each episode of the series thus far, and will end whenever the Angel Series Finale airs. Hope you enjoy the look into Cordelia’s mind as much as I will enjoy writing about it.
On a side note, each entry will be subtitled with a quote from the episode of which it’s about. Enjoy:
“Am I Wrong In Thinking A ‘Please‘ And ‘Thank You‘ Is In Order When Requesting A Dismemberment?”
November 20, 1999
Let me start off this entry by saying it has been a somewhat frustrating but interesting week, culminated by one of the weirdest events of my life. I know, I’ve lived in Sunnydale, seen every creature-of-the-night imaginable... but NOTHING could compare to what I witnessed last night!
Well, once more, let me start at the beginning... Angel, Doyle, and I had been hot on the trail of a giant squid-like creature that had found a nest in the sewers beneath LA, and Angel had killed it in short order... or so he thought. On Sunday night, the thing was back in force and out for our blood. Thus, Angel had to hold it off singlehandedly long enough for Doyle and I to run out for a weapon to slay the creature. What really sucked though, when it was finally taken care of, Angel just left the two of us to clean up the mess without so much as a “Thank you for helping.” In other words, we were to cut the squid into little tiny pieces so it couldn’t come back for Round Three.
Maybe normally, I wouldn’t mind so much, but this is Angel we’re talking about! I’ve seen him around our previous clients, not to mention his ex-girlfriend, Buffy! So I know he has it in him to be considerate and caring! Yet, when you take into account the way he takes us, his OWN co-workers for granted, you start to wonder about that!
At the end of that disgusting task (and a little fight on my part with a still-moving tentacle to save Doyle), the two of us returned to the office coated in slime and sewer dust, where I preceded to ream out Angel for not being sensitive enough. We talked it over for a bit, and I casually mentioned he pay closer attention to how people react to each other... at which point Detective Kate Lockley (a cop who is as far from sharing her feelings as you can get) enters the office asking to speak privately with my vampire boss.
Angel informed Doyle and I later, after we’d both showered, of what Kate’s problem was. She’d been tracking (or trying to) some guy known as Little Tony who murdered a friend of hers. Only dilemma is, her sources are dry, and she can’t find the creep to arrest him. Thus, she decides to enlist Angel’s help in this area. The easy part was that Little Tony had enough clues to his whereabouts lying around that Angel was able to locate him in no time. And Kate made her arrest, fair and square. I know what you’re thinking, this is the end of the story, right? Well, you’d be dead wrong!
Of course, Angel has the idea at that point that it was too easy, which I don’t get. I mean, Little Tony was human, not a demon, and humans aren’t quite as cautious or infallible... in my opinion. Thus, he and Doyle do some digging and get the impression that Little Tony may be out for revenge against Kate. Naturally, Angel went to see Detective Lockley to warn her to be careful... which is when things started to get... unusual, shall we say.
When Angel got back, he mentioned something in passing about how Kate and the members of her precinct had been ordered to take some sensitivity training. I didn’t pay much attention to that as I did to the fact that she had asked him out to her father’s retirement party. I guess I just got the sense then that something was off, like since when does Kate mix business with pleasure...?
However, when Angel called me back to the office much later that night, that’s when I realized just how bizarre things had gotten. Kate’s behavior wasn’t just a little off; it was WAY out of the ballpark! As Angel would later explain, this sensitivity training she and her fellow officers were involved in was making them immensely so through mystical means! So, while Angel took off to find whoever was leading these meetings, Doyle and I were appointed as Kate’s guardians, to keep her out of trouble. At first, it was fine, although Kate did weird me out a little the way she kept switching moods constantly. I don’t know what disturbed me more, the part where she started in on how I should give Doyle a chance, romantically speaking... or the part where she pulled a gun on us insisting she had to go out to see her father!
The worst was yet to happen though. After a few moments, Doyle and I followed Kate back to the police station to find the place in a state of chaos. Having a station full of hyper-sensitive cops is not good; there was no telling what any of them might do. So, it was sort of a good and bad thing that we happened to run into Angel just outside the front door. Good because he’s the one you want to turn to to defuse something like this. Bad because he had by then fallen victim to the same thing plaguing Kate and her fellow officers!
Needless to say, it was left to Doyle and I to take the initiative and break into the station (since the front door was locked), although it was nightmare trying to get Angel to go along with it. By that point, some officer or other had taken it upon himself to free all the prisoners they were holding, including Little Tony, who was holding Kate at gunpoint when we arrived on the scene. Guess the guy has a serious problem with being behind bars.
I’m still surprised that we got out of that situation, what with Angel and Kate both balking at the idea of doing violence. But apparently, even a touchy vampire and\or cop hate people who are unwilling to share their feelings even more. It’s insane, I know, but at least it got them to fight and subdue the guy in no time. So, everything worked out. Little Tony’s back behind bars, and Kate, Angel, and the others were back to normal (thank God!) by the next afternoon.
Out of curiosity, I did quiz Angel on the issue of Kate’s father, and he quietly told me that the person in question was revealed to be an uncaring, old police officer who shut down and shut out his own daughter when Kate’s mother died. Plus (and this is so sad), Kate had poured her heart out to her Dad during the party, maybe in the hopes he’d return the sentiment, but he just walked out on her! There’s a person who should have been subjected to this sensitivity mumbo-jumbo!
In addition, I have given a little thought, but just a little, to what Kate said about Doyle. More and more, I’ve been wondering at the prospect of dating him. I mean, he has his good qualities; he helped me find that delicious new apartment of mine for one and... okay, I can’t think of another one just now, but I’ll add more to the list as I go along.
Anyway, in closing, I take back what I thought at the start. Sure, I’d like Angel to be more considerate. In fact, I still do want that... But, for the record, seeing his sensitive side in full bloom is JUST PLAIN SCARY!