|
|
Disclaimer: I don't own them.
Author's Notes: I own no one. They are all the property of Joss Whedon. Aside from that, I suppose this story and the ones that will follow it require some explanation. As of the latest episode, “Expecting,” I have decided it might be fun to write down journal entries the way I imagine Cordelia would write them. There will be at least one to mark each episode of the series thus far, and will end whenever the Angel Series Finale airs. Hope you enjoy the look into Cordelia’s mind as much as I will enjoy writing about it.
On a side note, each entry will be subtitled with a quote from the episode of which it’s about. Enjoy:
“You‘re Not Him, Angel. Not Anymore.”
December 27, 1999
Here’s the deal: I don’t have very many friends in LA. There’s Angel and there’s Wesley, sure. But, other than that, my well of deep friendships is pretty much dry. I needed both the guys, needed to now I could ALWAYS count on them to be there--so it was kind of a wake-up call when I got a glimpse of Angel’s dark side this week, a reminder he wasn’t always a good vampire, in more ways than one.
That first morning started off with a few oddities. And no, I don’t mean with me giving a sales pitch to an empty chair. Wesley came around in time to catch me in the act, and we immediately set to “trading information”. The two of us more or less agreed that things were quiet all around, but midway through the conversation, I got the sense that Wesley was simply there hoping to team up for whatever new crisis. In any case, he surprisingly stopped yammering when I pointed out that the mail and newspaper he’d picked up wasn’t ours and handed both back to him.
We heard Angel coming up in the lift, and Wesley couldn’t seem to get out of the office any faster if he tried. I didn’t bother to question Wesley’s sudden exit because Angel’s behavior sort of distracted me. My boss seemed really out of it, irritable and everything like he hadn’t slept well. Plus, when I suggested he go to Kate at the police station to aid in a kidnapping case, he even tried walking out the front door--into the sunlight.
I waited around the office until nightfall hoping to hear something, but eventually I decided to call it a night, and see Angel the following morning. What made the day even odder though was that Wesley was lurking in the stairwell and actually invited himself in carrying a nice, pointy wooden stake. Of course, since there was only one vampire residing there, I had no doubt as to what Wes’ intention was.
My attempt to intervene did bring out an explanation though... remember how I said I knew Wesley from Sunnydale? Well, the real deal is that he was assigned as Buffy’s second Watcher (or mentor) after her first one was fired (for reasons too complex to get into). And apparently, he had been worried about Buffy’s relationship with a vampire (Angel) which led him to researching the latter. Which brings me back to the point...
Wesley showed me a clipping from the newspaper that morning, detailing the most recent murder by a serial killer. And, the scary part: the MO almost exactly matched one that Angel (back in his evil days) had adopted for HIS victims! I was ready to throw Wesley out, stating that he couldn’t accuse a friend of mine like this with no proof... until Angel appeared and confirmed that Wesley may be right.
Further delving into the matter revealed that Angel had been having dreams of committing both that murder and several before it. Key word BEING dreams; he refused to call them nightmares since a part of them had ACTUALLY enjoyed them! In any case, there was only one way for the three of us to know for sure; Angel volunteered to be chained to his bed from then until sunrise.
Come dawn, another newspaper proved without a doubt that Angel was innocent, that a fourth murder had occurred while he’d been locked up. Still, Angel insisted that the murders were STILL his doing, an admission that became clear when he told us about Penn, a vampire who he’d created centuries ago and to whom he’d taught his own personal methods of killing. The dreams were simply a fluke, the result of some psychic connection that Angel sometimes has with his “offspring.”
In an effort to track down Penn and eliminate him, Angel went to Kate and told her as much as was necessary to help her catch the killer. In return, he managed to “confiscate” a police radio to track her progress and that of her fellow officers. And, as I’m told, Penn was hunted down but subsequently escaped; the end result being that Kate unfortunately found out what Angel was.
Although I didn’t know it at the time, Penn himself stopped by our office the next morning, having used an overcoat to protect himself from the sun’s rays. He pumped me for information on Kate and Angel’s relationship, which he got until I figured out who he was. Once more, our vampiric serial killer came close to being slayed by Angel, but again escaped by using Wesley as a shield. And, before he ran out, Penn threatened to do something unexpected, something even worse than the murders he’d committed thus far.
In short, Angel figured that Penn was going after Kate despite his progeny’s attempt to throw him off track. There was a big fight between the three in the sewers beneath the station, of which Penn soon got the upper hand (or so he thought. And Kate, who’d previously threatened to slay not only Penn but Angel as well (she blamed both for these killings), went back on her word. I have to commend her for her strength and courage, considering the world of the supernatural was still new for her. But it also surprises me that she didn’t ram that stake through Angel’s heart as well as Penn’s when she had the chance. Maybe there’s hope for her yet.
The week was capped off with me and Angel sharing a heart-to-heart on the rooftop of our building that evening. I did my best to reassure him that he couldn’t be held responsible for Penn’s actions, or even his OWN way back when. Angel’s definitely changed for the better since he regained his human soul a hundred years back. I KNOW he’s not the same person who committed those atrocities, who created a few vampires to follow in his footsteps.
I think the talk did help Angel immensely, especially the part where I said I’d kill him personally if he ever reverted to his evil ways again. Afterwards, I saw him off on his newest mission, drummed up by one of my new head-splitting visions. Although there’s a chance that he might not always be fighting for the side of good, I’m finding my own personal reassurance in the fact that he may just balance out the lives he’s taken with the ones he’s saved. If there was ever one vampire who deserved to be redeemed one day, Angel is it.
But whichever way it goes, I’ll always be proud to call him my friend, and I’ll cherish that friendship for as long as I live...