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Disclaimer: I don't own them
Author's Notes: This is a sequel to "Sacrifice". I'm not sure if this was the type of sequel anyone was expecting. If you thought the last story was sad, then this will be as well (perhaps even more so). But if you are familiar with my writing, then you know what I like. Thanks to everyone who e-mailed me for a sequel. I hope you enjoy it.
Extra Note: This was written long before Season 4 of Buffy so take that into consideration as you read. Thank you. --Iago
Part 1
(As the story opens, Angel and Buffy are fighting vampires. Picture them in combat as you read this soliloquy)
*There is a moment of clarity; a time when all that you have done comes into perspective. It's frightening, really, the lucid feeling that overwhelms you, allowing you a wider view of all that has happened. People talk about seeing their lives flash before their eyes when death looms near. I'd already died once, but I saw nothing; only the light fading to darkness. Perhaps I had nothing to see, no true life to have looked upon . . . no moments of true happiness to recall as my life's blood was drained from me. Y'know, it's weird how life can change so drastically, though.*
(The two are still fighting, but one of the demons drives an object deep into Angel's chest. His eyes open wide with horror. The soliloquy continues.)
*Here I am, over two hundred years later and I make a mistake. I feel the skin break and a sharp pain, but everything becomes so clear. In that moment of clarity, my mind is opened to a wider mental vista, a more complete perspective than I have ever had. At this moment, the perceptual blindfolds fall away from my eyes and I gaze across time . . . .*
Los Angeles-1999
Angel closed his trenchcoat as he surveyed the dark street ahead. He blew onto his hands unconsciously before realizing that no warmth emanated from within himself, nor air for that matter. He looked to the bright moon above and imagined for a moment that it was the sun on a warm sunny day. He could almost feel the heat on his skin as he closed his eyes. There were plenty of things that Angel had held close to his heart about those few months when he had walked the world mortal, alive and kicking. There had been the sunrises, the cool mornings, the quiet walks on the beach, but what Angel truly missed was the one meaning to his life . . . Buffy. She was what he really missed about being alive. He had no future with her, for he could not allow himself to hold her back from living. But he missed her.
The streets were familiar; almost like he had not even left. He'd been back for six months now and everynight while on patrol he thought of Buffy. He looked at the stars above. Beautiful. He momentarily wished that he could share a quiet stargaze with Buffy. But he shook the thought from his head. *Was she watching the same sky?* A terrified scream echoed through the quiet streets. *Business as usual.* Angel took off in a dead run for the source of the scream. He rounded a corner that led into an alley way and there stood two vampires proceeding to feed upon what appeared to be an elderly homeless woman.
"Hey, don't you guys know any respect. Pick on someone your own size." Angel stepped up provokingly, his human face still intact.
One of the vampires growled viciously as the other tossed the woman aside like a doll. She rolled over in pain, but obviously alive which satisfied Angel. He watched the distorted faces and yellow eyes grin as they anticipated an even better feeding. They moved forward slowly as if enjoying the moment before they were going to pounce. Angel observed the dark lines and hideousness of their faces and thought how hard it must have been for Buffy to see him like that.
The first vampire, big and slow, leapt at Angel with outstretched arms and mouth wide. The vampire hunter stepped aside and planted a roundhouse kick into the demon's midsection, doubling him over. As the vampire dropped to its knees, Angel rammed his elbow to its back, feeling bones crack beneath the force of the blow. The second vampire was leaner and quicker. It came at Angel swinging doubled fists, one of which grazed him across the chin. The vampire had anticipated that Angel would fall on one blow and instead of following up his haymaker, it leapt at Angel, proceeding to bite down on his neck. Angel lifted the demon off the ground and tossed it into the wall. The vampire growled angrily.
Angel, standing in the shadows momentarily, stepped into the center of the alley which was adaquately lit by the moon above. What the vampire saw now was not another victim, but another vampire. Angel had put on his game face and now it was him who let out an angry growl. He bared his teeth, but what the vamp saw in Angel's right hand was even more frightening. It was a stake.
"Angelus," the big vampire said under his breath, and then he tried to run, but it was to no avail. Angel dropped him to the concrete and with one fluid motion, he placed the wooden stake deep into the demon's heart. It let out a momentary shriek of both pain and hysteria and then it combusted into a ball of dust. Angel turned to the other vampire who was lifting himself to his feet.
"The fun's not over yet," Angel told him.
The vampire took off running down the alley, but Angel let loose the stake as if it were a throwing knife. The stake landed dead center and the vampire turned to dust as it cried in despair, arms outstretched to the salvation of the darkness. There was none, not while Angel walked the streets.
"Bravo," came a voice from the darkness followed by clapping. "Bravo indeed. Looks like I taught you well."
"Who's there?"
"An old friend."
From the shadows stepped a small man. He was dressed in ridiculously oversized pants and an unmatching silk shirt. The hat atop his head had been out of style for decades. He wore a lopsided grin and looked like a teenager with his hands in his pockets. Angel's face returned to its human guise as he recognized the man who stood before him. It was Whistler.
"What are you doing here?" Angel asked.
"Uh, I'm looking for some prime real estate, preferably something with a view of vampires being killed," Whistler replied sarcastically. Then his face changed. "I'm here to see you. How are you doing?"
"I'm okay."
Angel started walking away, stopping once to pick up his stake. Whistler fell in step with him as they continued slowly down the street. An uneasy silence fell between the two.
"I heard about Iago. You did a great job. The Fates are pleased with your work."
"I bet they are." Angel sounded bitter.
Whistler stopped and took hold of Angel's arm
"You sound like you're angry. That's wrong. You're here to make a difference Angel, to make amends . . . not to live a normal life. This is a war we fight, not an occasional skirmish that sometimes disrupts our lives, but an unyielding conflict of good versus evil. I'm sorry that your girl's Watcher gave you back mortality only to have to take it from you again. I'm sorry the Prince of Darkness was trying to destroy the world, but these things happen Angel . . .for a reason. All we can do is play our part. I've walked this world for almost three thousand years combating evil, but our struggle never ends. We fight, Angel. A normal life? Love? It's not meant for us. We're here to redress the wrongs we've done. That's all."
Angel felt ashamed. He had been feeling sorry for himself yet again. "I know. I'm sorry."
Whistler watched his pupil and friend. "It's okay. I'm not here to argue ethics for the undead with you, there's trouble up ahead."
"Trouble?"
"We have a renegade demon on our hands. One of my superiors actaully. His name is Legion. He was a member of the Council of Fates that oversees the war against evil. Through the years he has become disillusioned with our cause. He believes humanity is inferior and should be eliminated. Now normally I would say if the demon wants to gravitate to the darkside, so be it, but he is crucial to the balance between good and evil. He knows our secrets and he knows what we know. He has become a soldier of darkness and will proceed with determination to open the gates."
"The Hellmouth?"
Whistler nodded. "What are you prepared to do?"
"Whatever I need to do. I follow my destiny." At that second people were coming around the corner, a couple holding hands and snuggling close together as the cold winds began to become unbearable. Angel watched the two sadly. They seemed so happy. They had such simple lives. There was envy, but not regret. Whistler was right. He fought for humanity, this to amend the wrongs he had committed. He turned to see the small Immortal watching him.
"Have you made your peace with the Slayer?"
"You mean Buffy?"
"Yes. This is a Slayer's fight, but she'll need your help." Whistler's face became seriously hard. "Legion has made his move. He will proceed to open the gate, completing his separation from the Good. That is his baptism into evil. He has already begun to recruit from *our* people; he is mustering his forces. He will open the Hellmouth and the Darkside will grant him an army and he will wage war with us first before he wipes mankind from the face of the Earth." Whistler fell silent. "Are you prepared to see her again?
"Are you preapred to go back to Sunnydale?"
Slowly, Buffy made her way through Wetherly Park. She was alone, walking with her hands in her pockets yet her eyes on the stars above. She wondered what Angel was doing at that moment. Perhaps he was staring at the same stars and by doing same, Buffy felt that this was something they could share. The moment was without consequence . . . but not without pain. Angel had been gone for six months now, but the longing was still there. She had moved on, she would continue to move on, but there was only so far you could go sometimes.
The streets were quiet. The vampires she had once hunted nightly had migrated elsewhere. With the mayor gone, Sunnydale was less attractive to the dark element that had once roamed the streets with false bravado. It made her job easier, but the she had more time to think of Angel. Not that she minded the pain. It was concrete. It was an unspoken bond they shared, for she knew without a doubt that Angel longed for her with the same passion.
As she walked, a rustling of leaves caught her attention. She silently made her way through the underbrush to find a handful of vampires stepping from the sewers. Her Slayer senses came alive. *Good.* It was time to relieve some tension. She stepped from the shadows. "I thought you guys understood that you're not welcome here anymore. Don't you guys read the travel brochures before you take a vacation? There's no vacancy in Sunnydale anymore."
The vampires growled guitily. They had obviously been prepaing for someting. "Slayer," one of the vampires said slowly. "*He* knew you would come."
"Who . . ." Buffy asked with a sly grin.
"He--"
" . . .cares?" Buffy cut him off and attacked. The first two vampires she staked easily, but a big one lunged for her, his momentum knocking her to the floor. She swept his legs from him and staked him with a fluid motion. The only vampire remaining was the one she briefly conversed with. He kept his distance.
Buffy held out her arms. "Well, what are you waiting for?"
His eyes drifted behind her. Buffy laughed. "Like I'm going to fall for that one. What do I look like . . .a blonde? There's no one behind me . . . ."
"Yes there is, " a voice growled. Buffy had no time to turn. Powerful hands lifted her three feet off the ground and hurled her into a stone wall ten feet away. Buffy shook her head and looked up groggily to see her attacker. It was a tall man, plain in appearance, and without the look of strength she had anticipated. Then the man changed before her eyes, morphing into an even larger demon. Buffy, using the wall for leverage, got to her feet.
"You tiresome young fool. I knew you'd intefere. You came sooner that I had expected though. Which is good for me and bad for you. You'll die without ever knowing what you could have tried to stop."
The demon stepped toward her and Buffy attacked with all her strength. It was to no avail. The demon took her blows without even the slightest reaction and took her by the neck. Buffy struggled uselessly. The demon smiled.
At that moment the sole remaining vampire who had stood to the side during the skirmish exploded into a cloud of dust. The demon turned with wonder. As he did, a large branch struck him across the face. It did not hurt him as much as it had surprised him and the demon let go of Buffy who fell back gasping for air. Again the branch swung connecting and breaking with the demon's head and the being staggered aside momentarily.
"Angel?" Buffy saw her guardian holding out his hands and he yanked her to her feet and lofted her atop his shoulder. He took off in a dead run with not so much as sparing a glance to see if he was being pursued.
A small distance away, he let Buffy down and looked back to see the demon emerging from the bushes.
"Can you run?"Angel asked quickly.
"Angel, what's going on?"
"Don't . . . later . . . can you run?"
"Yes," she replied. He took hold of her hand quickly, pulling her. "Then RUN!!"
The two of them ran for what seemed like an eternity, Angel risking glances back every once and awhile. Finally, he found an alley and pulled Buffy inside as he looked around the corner for their pursuer. There was no one and Angel was satisfied momentarily. He looked down at Buffy who was bruised and winded.
"Angel, what are you doing here? My God," she hugged him tightly, her mind scrambled with questions and things she wanted to say. "Thank you, Angel. If it weren't for you . . .well. . .Giles would actually be out of a job."
Angel tried to be stoic. He had to control his feelings. He had to be strong. Him . . . the weak one. He kept Buffy at a distance. "Buffy, this isn't a personal visit. It's business. Big business. That demon you fought isn't something you've faced before. It's an Immortal, one of the Fates. There's big trouble ahead."
Though Buffy had almost died in the confrontation and she knew the world could be over soon, those thoughts seemed of little concern at that moment. Buffy could feel his body next to her's and her heart raced. "Angel, I've missed you so much."
Angel wanted to take her into his arms and let go, but he could not. He was a vampire and she was a young woman. She had a future to live, one that could not be held back by a being who could never live the life of a normal human. He'd left for a reason he would never deny Buffy her future. No matter what. He looked down at Buffy and his heart sank. He had to stop this or he would never be able to help with Legion. He did what he could. He ignored her words without the slightest look of regret.
"We have work to do. Get everyone together, Buffy. There isn't much time."
Buffy looked at him, tears welling in her eyes. She knew he was only doing it because he loved her so much and could not deal with it openly. But even knowing this made it no easier for the Slayer to accept. She looked down sadly and nodded her head. "Okay, let's get started."
Willow and Oz came to Giles' apartment as soon as they could. Once they knew Angel had returned they had expected the worse. Both knew how hard it must have been for Angel to return knowing he could never have his love. It was hard for Buffy too, but Angel was alone. And solitude was not something that could be adjusted to, even for a cursed vampire.
Willow saw the pain in her friend's eyes, no matter how hard he tried to hide it. The cool grin was fooling no one. Willow tried to be strong for Angel's sake as she rushed to hug him. Oz understood without a word, the bond he and Willow shared bordering on psychic and so he played along as well. Willow embraced Angel long and hard.
"God, it's so great to see you, Angel. We've missed you so much." Willow became nervous. *Was she saying something wrong?* She had to say something, but what? Oz stepped in.
"How's the big city, Angel?" Oz asked, offeing Wilow a quick smile. She sighed with relief, as Angel began to talk of his past six months patrolling the streets of L.A. and how the *underground* knew of Buffy and her reputation, as well as of her Watcher and her gang of *possible Slayers-in-Training*.
Xander walked in at that moment, catching the last of the conversation. "What? Slayers-in-training? Me too?" His eyes went wide with pride and surprise. "Vampires are afraid of me?"
Angel truly smiled for the first time since arriving back in Sunnydale. Xander. There was no other like him in the world, and Angel had been everywhere. He moved over to him slowly. "Yeah, Xander, the demons heard about your battle strategies against the mayor and his soldiers. They're afraid of you down there."
Everyone knew Angel was exagerrating, but Xander was lost on the thought and he was completely ecstatic. "Wow. Demons afraid of me." He seemed to ponder the thought momentarily. Cordelia, who was behind him commented what the others were probably thinking. "He's kidding with you, Xander. A monkey could have put together that mess you're always bragging about."
Cordelia's words were lost on Xander though. He was still lost in thoughts of vampires running from him in fear. Angel walked up to him and Xander came back to reality. He, too, noticed the look of sadness in Angel's eyes and against Xander-type fashion, there were no snide comments or deadboy remarks. The two embraced and Xander, for the first time, realized how truly alone Angel was. He suspected that Angel needed someone to confide to just how lonely he was, to let loose the pain of knowing he had to let go his soul mate . . .but this wasn't the time nor the place.
"So. What demon is trying to destroy the world this time?" Xander asked hesitantly, hands nervously digging into his jean pockets.
Giles emerged with Buffy and a handful of books. Angel and Buffy momentarily locked eyes and time seemed to stop. They held each other for that second in time, exchanging caresses and soft words which could not be done in reality. Angel looked down guiltily and Buffy swallowed hard trying to be strong and not give way to tears.
"Everyone have a seat," Giles said, setting the books down on the coffee table before him. "And Xander," Giles added, taking off his glasses to emphasize the seriousness, "please no jokes for the moment."
Xander smiled, a hint of embarrassment surfacing. He pointed to himself. "Me?"
Giles laughed. "Try your hardest."
Cordelia smacked Xander's arm. "Yeah. Keep your mouth shut. This is important stuff, Xander."
"Good," Giles stated, sitting down next to Buffy. He turned to Angel. "Okay, Angel, you have the floor."
Angel glanced at his friends. He cared for them deeply, and he was sad that the only times he could see them were in moments of crisis that could possibly be fatal for any one of them. He swallowed hard; he had to be strong. Too much was riding on this.
"Well, as you pretty much expect there is some bad trouble ahead. I was visited by a mentor of mine, a good demon named Whistler who walks the earth representing the Fates who oversee the war between good and evil. His job is to keep balance, so evil cannot overstep its boundaries. He is not allowed to physically intefere, but he offers me guidance and such. He came to me in Los Angeles with a serios dilemma. It seems one of his superiors, one of the Fates, has grown weary with humanity. He has become disillusioned with our existence and has come to regard humanity as inferior beings who deserve to be exterminated. He has come to the mortal world to clear the way for the Old Ones. The demon's name is Legion.
"What makes him something to be feared is he once resided on the Council of Good. He knows of us, all of us. He knows our strengths. he knows our weaknesses. He knows that Whistler will call for me to intercede, he knows that Buffy will try to stop him. He knows that Giles will search his books for his weaknesses, and he knows that you guys, "Angel eyed everyone, "will help without regard for your own lives.
"Legion has made a pact with the First Evil, and his baptism into the darkness will be the opening of the Hellmouth. He knows the necessary incantations and sacrifices to do the job. When and if he succeeds, he will amass an army and he will make war with the Council of Good. They will be destroyed. He will then proceed to wipe away every last vestige of humanity from the face of the earth. No one will be spared. No slaves, no prisoners. Just death for any mortal.
"Now we have all fought against evils together in the past, but this is different. We are not dealing with demon hybrids or vampire kings or demon ascensionists. This is the real thing, of the greatest purity of immortality that has grown sour and evil. This is not going to be an easy battle, and this being the case, I'm going to do something I've never had to do. I'm going to offer you the choice to not become involved."
There were quick disagreements from the gang and Angel raised his hands. "This is a great evil here. There may be fatalities in this venture. And . . . you are my friends. I do not wish harm on any of you. I beg you, please consider the consequences of this fight. There is no wrong in being afraid, and I will wish you god speed if you choose to walk away now."
The room was quiet.
Angel turned to Buffy. "Buffy . . . ." Angel started. He searched for his words carefully. "You've encountered Legion, you know his strength, his anger. You've done your time, you've fought your wars. This need not be your fight. You are under no council's orders any longer, Buffy." He said those words but what he had wanted to say was *I love you and you might die. I could not lose you anymore than I already have*.
"What about you Angel?" Willow asked nervously. "Why do you have to put yourself in danger again?"
Angel smiled at her compassion. She was truly his friend. They all were. "It is my destiny, Willow. I fight because I have debts that can never be repaid. I will spend my years making amends for the wrongs I committed. It is a fight I was allowed to partake in . . . retribution for all that has happened. I cannot walk away. I will not walk away."
Buffy stood up. "I'm a Slayer, Angel, Council or no Council. I will fight because I was chosen, too. Whatever has happened, that much hasn't changed." She too longed to say much more, but she could not.
Giles stood up next. "I, too, was chosen for this life, and it is one I respect. I fight for those I love, and for this world I care for so much. And as far as Joyce is concerned, I would rather die protecting her, then allow some demon to take her world in the name of evil."
Angel nodded his head. He looked at the others. He saw no hesitation in their eyes as they all stood up in unison. Xander spoke. "I won't lie and say I'm not afraid. Terrified doesn't even begin to describe what I'm feeling, but I agree with Giles. I'm in this fight for you guys, for Cordy here, who I love too much to give up without a fight." Cordelia held onto Xander at that moment and gave him the greatest look of love and admiration that Angel had ever seen from her. "And if you think," Xander continued, "that I'd let you and Buffy fight this thing alone, you're crazy." Everyone agreed, and Angel looked at his friends slowly. He longed to tell them all how much he had missed them, how he prayed for them even though he did no pray for himself, but he could not. War was imminent and this type of longing was a distraction . . .it could prove to be a fatal one.
"I guess that means it is time for research," Giles said, breaking the lucidity of the moment. They all sat down, the future a cloud of wonder and fear.
Buffy looked up from the book with feeling that someone was watching her. She eyed the gang, seeing their faces buried within their own research. Then she saw Angel, sitting on the steps leading to Giles' bedroom. He had been watching her, but when she caught his stare, he had quickly averted his eyes. Buffy kept her eyes on Angel and waited until he looked up to see if she was still watching him, and when he did their eyes locked momentarily. Again, Angel looked away. That was enough. She went to him.
He watched her take the steps slowly, her eyes down, and she sat quietly beside him. He tried not to look at her, but there was no use for him to be mean to make the love stop. He didn't want his sacrifice twisted into some sad idealistic crusade. The scarifice he had made had been for Buffy, and if he had to torture himself with what he could not have for *her* sake, then so be it. She was all that truly mattered anyway.
"So . . . " Buffy was at a loss for words.
"So." He did not have much else to add, or perhaps it was that there was too much to say and he could not.
"What's the Big City like nowadays?" It was all Buffy could allow herself to say at that moment.
"It's the same I guess. There are some vampires, but since I've been there, most have gone elsewhere . . . or they've died again."
Silence.
"How's the slaying been? with the Mayor gone and all?"
"There hasn't been much work. There's no longer protection from the Top, but the Hellmouth still attracts them. I patrol, but not as often."
"Good."
Silence.
Buffy took hold of Angel's hand softly. "I watch the stars everynight, Angel. I sometimes feel that you're watching them too, that . . . .we're watching them together. I know it sounds dumb . . . ."
Angel's eyes lit up. "No, I feel it , too. Sometimes I just stand there and stare. It makes me feel . . . warm."
"I know," Buffy added, giving way to words she had tried to suppress. "Angel, I miss you so much. This is wrong. I know you left me for my own good, but this is wrong. You wanted me to live my life? You call this living? Longing for you, hoping that every tall guy in a trench is you? I love you. Only you. You *are* my life, and I don't care about that other stuff you talked about in the letter!"
"But you will, "Angel exclaimed, trying to keep his voice low. "Buffy, you might hurt for a while, but today, even tomorrow goes by so quickly. Maybe you don't think about marriage or children or grandchildren, but one day you will and I won't hold you back. I can't. Your life is awkward enough as a Slayer, having a vampire around only makes the world for you even more askewed."
"It doesn't matter, Angel. All of that, we'll deal with it when the time comes." Buffy countered, tears beggining to well in her eyes. She eyed the gang below cautiously. They were researching, Giles and Willow discussing something in the kitchen. She knew they could hear the argument, but they were being polite in pretending to notice nothing. Buffy grabbed Angel by the arm and led him upstairs to Giles' room.
Angel took a few steps from Buffy then turned to face her. "Buffy, please understand that I love you. I would give anything for you and even though you don't see it now, this is for the best. *Your* best." He looked down. "When this is over, if we survive, I'm leaving again, and there's nothing you can say that will stop me."
Tears had begun to fall softly from Buffy's eyes. "I can't live without you, Angel. If you leave, I'll follow you. I won't let you get rid of me so easily."
"Esay? Buffy, I'd rather be staked then without you, don't you understand? When I go, Buffy, you cannot follow. You have a life, live it. Don't waste it. Life is the most valuable possession you have. It's a gift. Don't take it for granted, live . . . for me."
Buffy understood Angel's words and she was even more saddened. He had had his first life taken from him by Darla when her fangs had drained him of a future and then he'd given his second life to save her. He'd been denied a life twice in his existence. She understood. She didn't want Angel's sacrifice to have been in vain, but it did not make the pain any less.
Perhaps the debate would have gone on forever, for it seemed certain that neither was quite ready to give way, but Xander's voice ended the standoff.
"Guys, I think we have a plan."