|
|
Part 2
Willow came out of the kitchen carrying the bowl of popcorn and two glasses with ice. She took a deep breath. "I hope you like the popcorn."
"I'm sure I will cause you made it." He took the bowl and glasses from her, set them on the table and grabbed the remote. "The movie's all set up. I didn't fast forward through the previews 'cause I know you love to watch 'em."
She took the remote from him. "Actually Oz, I really have to tell you something first," and shut off the TV.
"You have my undivided attention, shoot." He said sitting up.
She started fidgeting w/ the label on the bottle of soda. "Well, remember how you couldn't take me to homecoming 'cause you had to play that night?
"Yeah."
"And you know how I hung out with Xander before the dance 'cause you were helping set the band up?"
"Uh-huh."
"Well….ummm…well see….what happened was….."
"Hey," he looked her straight in the eye and grabbed a hold of her hand. "You know you can tell me anything."
She sighed, "OK, this is it. I'm just gonna say it." And then blurted out all in one breath, "I was getting dressed behind the shade thingie but it was perfectly innocent and when I came out Xander said I looked really good and he looked nice too so we I went to help him tie his tie and then he gave me this crazy look and…the…we… kissed."
She kept her head down. She couldn't bare to look him in the eye.
"Oh," was all he could say. That had been the last thing he expected to hear that night. He knew that Willow used to like Xander alot, but he really believed that she was over him.
"Well, it didn't really mean anything. At least I don't think…well, I don't know." She was even more confused than before.
"So, you still have feelings for Xander?
A pretty stupid question, but he didn't know what else to say.
"Um, yeah…well, no." She sighed. "I don't know. Are you mad?" She asked, hoping that all of a sudden it wouldn't be wolf-city or something. She'd seen that side of him once before and it wasn't pretty.
"Yeah…well, relatively. But I'll get over it I guess. I know what you're thinking, and you don't have to worry about me going off half-cocked and picking and fight with Xander or something. It's not my style. Besides, it'd hardly be fair with me being a werewolf and all and him just being a regular guy." He looked at her. "He is just a regular guy, right? I mean he's not like some crazy love-demon or has you under a spell or anything, right?" It was worth a shot.
"No, not that I know of."
He started messing with the nail polish on his nails so he didn't have to look at her.. "Well anyway, the point is…I love you and I want to be with you, but if you don't want to be with me, I won't turn into stalker guy or anything. If you REALLY want to be with him, I'll leave you alone. Is that what you want? Do you want to be with him?"
Willow just sat there for a second. She hadn't heard anything past the "I love you" part. "Wait a minute. What did just you say?"
"I asked you if you wanted to be with Xander."
Maybe she had heard him wrong. "No, no. Before that."
Oz thought for a second. At that point he was just saying things off the top of his head. Then he realized what he had said. That he loved her. Did he mean it? Wow, he was pretty sure he did mean it. He blushed only slightly and said, "Umm. I said that...that I love you."
"Did you really mean it?"
"Yeah, I really did. Really DO." He reached up and stroked her cheek. "Be crazy not to. Wouldn't I? With you being so smart, funny and witty all rolled into a little ball. A cute little ball. I mean, not literally a ball, but you get what I'm saying right?" His composure was gone. He was now rambling- man. He really hoped that he didn't sound as dumb to Willow as he did to himself.
"But…you've never said anything like that before."
"Well, I guess maybe I just didn't realize it. I mean, I knew that I liked you a lot and that I really dig spending time with you. When I started thinking about the possibility of not being with you and it hurt. Bad."
Willow's mind was reeling. She never thought that Oz was that serious about their relationship. He was older. In a band. Plenty of girls would go out with him. He's had other girlfriends. Why her? It was hard to believe anyone would really feel that way about her. She thought about all the wonderful things he always did for her and the sweet words he said to make her feel good about herself.
"Besides, how could I not fall in love with a beautiful face like yours?" Once again, reached up and touched her face with his hand.
Willow felt this strange feeling rush over her, almost as if she had just been hit by a wave in the ocean. And she had this really funny feeling in her stomach. All of a sudden, all she wanted to do was kiss Oz. She leaned over and that's exactly what she did. He didn't stop her. It was a long passionate kiss. The kind you see in movies. The kind that last an eternity. The kind Willow always dreamed about. Before either one of them knew what was happening, they were laying down on the couch, with Oz on top of Willow. They hadn't stopped kissing for one second. Willow could hardly breath. But she didn't want to stop kissing him. They kissed like that, for what seemed to the both of them, like hours. And then, almost as if being guided purely by instinct, Willow reached up and started to undo Oz's belt. It was a big step for her, but it felt so right.
Oz felt Willow loosening his belt and he was ready to kick himself for what he was about to do. He put his hand on top of hers. "Wil, we…gotta…gotta..stop." He said between kisses. Then finally, completely sat up and re-did his belt.
Willow was confused. "What? Why?" She sat up too. "Are you still mad? But you said to choose. I am choosing. I want to be with you."
"Yeah, right now you do. And who could blame you? Teenage hormones can be lethal. They tell you that in health class all the time. And there is NOTHING, believe me when I say that, NOTHING that I want to do more right now." He got up and started to pace around the room, trying to work off the energy he had built up in the last twenty minutes. "I've thought about this. ALOT. And I want it to be a special thing for both of us. I mean, a few minutes ago, you weren't sure whether or not you still loved Xander and now you're ready to have sex with me. But that's just it. I don't want to have sex with you."
Now she was REALLY confused.
"No, if anything at all…. I want to make love to you. And I can't do that if you're in love with someone else. I don't want you to decide right now. Too much has happened tonight. Take the night and sleep on it. Take two if you need it. I'll be here and I'll wait." He picked her chin up and looked into her eyes. "You're worth it."
Oz came over and sat back down next to her on the couch. "But for now, let's just sit here and watch the movie, and think about baseball," he said with a smile.
"Baseball?" She thought for a second, until she figured it out. "Oh I get. Baseball."
Oz hit the play button on the remote and the previews started.
Monday morning Willow walked through the hall deep in thought. She was still kinda reeling from the whole episode that went on over the weekend. She had spent all day Saturday and Sunday deciding what to do. But she was pretty sure she had figured it out. After years of being in love with Alexander Harris, she realized for the first time, that it was really never going to happen. She really wasn't sad though. She had figured out that Xander approached relationships with a "the grass is greener on the other side of the fence" kind of philosophy. He always wanted what he couldn't have. Like Buffy, for example. Xander was in love with Buffy forever. Willow was sure he never had even thought of her in a girlfriend-type way until everything with Oz was going well. But Oz, he had liked her all along. He always treated her like a beautiful woman and not just "one of his pals". She knew that she finally had to give up the idea of ever being anymore to Xander than just a friend. And she knew that she really did love Oz and that if given the chance, their relationship could grow into something incredibly special. She took and deep breath, and felt really good about her decision. Suddenly she heard yelling.
"Are you kidding me? You weren't even man enough to just tell me?" It was Cordy yelling at Xander in front of his locker. "Cordy, I'm sorry."
"Well, sorry's not good enough. You're gonna have to do some MAJOR kissing up mister." Willow turned around and decided to go the other way to class. She didn't want anything to ruin the good mood she was in. Besides, she had told Xander so.