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The world didn’t make sense anymore. Once it had; Sebastien spent his time taking every girl in his school and during the summer, the upper register of New York, and once in a while pausing to verablly spar with Kathryn or his parents, or do some kind of homework so he kept his straight A average at Manchester. Nothing else had mattered. His reputation has been the only important thing, and his journal his most treasured possession, besides his car. The only woman he’d ever wanted for more than a day had been Kathryn.
Nothing made sense anymore.
Sebastien wandered the streets blindly, seeing only her. He could still taste her on his lips. It wasn’t just physically wanting her either, though he did. He needed her. From his heart. From his soul. It was an ache, it was everything.
He loved her.
All this time he’d told himself it was the best, it was infatuation. But it wasn’t even close. It was better that she’d turned him away; he didn’t want to make love to her because of a bet. But he wanted to make love to her.
She had to love him back. She did. He could see it in her eyes, feel it in her hands and her mouth on his. She loved him as he loved her. Something held her back. Something was stopping her. He just had to show her the truth. He had to make her realize. Because he couldn’t go on like this much longer.
Buffy lay on her bed, curled up and crying softly. Jewel played on the her stereo, singing about strength but Buffy didn’t think she had any left. Why had she pushed him away? She’d seen his face. He wasn’t coming back. Back to the house maybe, but not to her. She’d lost her chance.
She’d lost her love. Again.
There was sound on the stairs. Someone coming up. Buffy pushed herself to a sitting position, hoping her mother wouldn’t come in and find her crying. She sniffed and wiped at her eyes and then the door swung open and he was there. He was there.
Oh God, he was there.
In less than seconds, Buffy was across the room. The door slammed behind him and they were kissing as if there was no more time in the world. Sebastien’s hands found the clip in Buffy’s hair and pulled it out, burying his hands in the golden strands. She pulled at his jacket, managing to get it off and bracing her hands against his chest. After a moment he pulled away and their eyes met.
"I love you," he said softly. Buffy looked up and met his eyes, so dark, so like Angel’s. But this wasn’t Angel. This was Sebastien. Before she could reply, he kissed her, and then all thoughts were lost in the sweetness of his mouth and his hands and the darkness that enveloped them both.
Buffy awoke to "Absence of Fear" by Jewel playing. She didn’t open her eyes for a long moment, savoring being where she was, with him. Eventually she did, and he was awake, smiling at her. She could have lain there forever; unfortunately she heard her mother and freaked.
"You better go," she whispered, sitting up. She realized she was undressed and grabbed at the covers shyly. Even Angel hadn’t…he smiled and sat up, grabbing his pants before he stepped out of the bed. She averted her eyes shyly until he grabbed her hands and she looked at him, pulling on his shirt.
"I’ll be quiet," he whispered, leaning down to kiss her swiftly. She almost forgot the sheets to reach for him, but grabbed it again.
"Good night," she breathed. He smiled softly and then slipped out the door,
and this time she did forget, wanting to keep him with her.