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Disclaimer:Secret Smile belongs to Semisonic, and Buffy and Angel belong to Joss and Co. I'm not claiming to own anything, so please don't sue me.
Author's Notes: This is a semi-angsty Buffy and Angel piece. I know I've been writing a lot of those lately, but that's what I've been feeling. Plus, I haven't figured how to work with Graduation Pt2 and back without angst.
Buffy was sitting at The Bronze, moping.
She was unable to think about anything except the fact that Angel had left and he wasn't coming back.
He had left her, it was over. After everything, he had left.
Reasonably she knew why, but it still hurt like Hell. She didn't know if it would ever heal again.
Just then Secret smile by Semionic came on. Buffy felt someone watching her, like Angel used to. She pushed the thought from her mind, and looked up to see who was watching her.
She didn't see anybody.
Nobody knows it but you've got a secret smile
And you use it only for me
Nobody knows it but you've got a secret smile
And you use it only for me
She listened to the lyrics, and smiled her first real smile since Graduation. She thought about Angel, and that smile he had just for her.
She remembered the last time he had used it, the day before he broke up with her. The smile disappeared.
So use it and prove it
Remove this whirling sadness
I'm losing, I'm bluesing
But you can save me from madness
She got up, she wasn't in a partying mood, she didn't knwo if she would ever be again. She forced herself to sit down, she needed to get over it.
Get over Angel.
Nobody knows it but you've got a secret smile
And you use it only for me
Nobody knows it but you've got a secret smile
And you use it only for me
Was that possible? Could she ever get over Angel? She didn't know, right now it seemed like no. She just went back to listening to the song.
Trying to keep her mind off Angel, and a wound that was still too fresh.
So save me I'm waiting
I'm needing, hear me pleading
And soothe me, improve me
I'm grieving, I'm barely believing now, now
She needed Angel, she just wished he knew how much. She needed him because she wasn't sure how to live without him. He was so important to her, he meant so much.
Then she held her head up high, she wasn't going to be like this. She was going to be strong, she wasn't going to be a whimpering mess just because Angel left.
She stood up again, and turned to leave.
Determined to be strong.
When you are flying around and around the world
And I'm lying alonely
I know there's something sacred and free reserved
And received by me only
Hidden in the shadows the man who had requested the song stay hidden. Angel knew he shouldn't be here, that was why he couldn't let her see. But he had to see her, to make sure she was alright. He saw that she was, or would be.
She would be okay, so would he.
The song had been to make her feel better, but it had done the same for him. He smiled the smile he used only for her.
His own secret smile.
He just hoped that one day she would get to see it again, that one day he could see her again.