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Angel and Harker sat at a table in study. They were richly ingrossed in their discussion about the trading market. Atleast Harker was, Angel had not listened to a word he said. His body was here, but his mind was on Buffy. She and Mariah had been gone for a while, he was starting to worry, and it wasn't because she was gone. It was worry about what would happen when Buffy came back, now that he knew the results of what his actions had done to Buffy, he was furious at himself. By leaving her he had hurt her more than he ever could by staying with her.
Angel knew it in his heart it would be hard to leave her, one look in her eyes and he would back down. But to give her the life she deserves, he would push all the selfishness of desperately wanting her. Angel was so wrapped up in his guilt trip, he never heard Harker calling him.
"Adam...Adam?!" Harker called, repeatedly
"What??"
Harker frowned. "Are you OK? Did you hear a word I said?"
Angel looked guilty. "I'm sorry." He said, turning his head away. "I've got other things on my mind."
"It's Elizabeth isn't it?" Harker analyzed
Angel snapped his head back to Harker, he didn't expect this man to know him so well, or the man he was trying to portray.
"What's happening between you two? Two days ago you two were inseparable, now you two act so tense around each other, as if your strangers." Harker said, wanting to know what was going on with his best friend.
"Nothing" He said, trying to drop the subject.
"It's something." Harker insisted.
Angel sighed, seeing no other way to get out of this conversation. "We had a fight." He said, resigned
"What about?"
Angel stayed silent, he wasn't used to just pouring his heart out to anyone, and he was trying very hard not too. But this man was stubborn.
Harker wouldn't take that. "Come on Adam, this me your talking too."
"I..I don't deserve her." Angel said, dropping his eyes to the ground. "I think she'd be better off without me."
"Adam, not again!" Harker replied, tossing his hands in the air. "Let's not go through this again!
Angel was now confused.
Harker breathed a sigh. "Adam, as I said before, if she didn't want you, why is she still here, why does she put up with things just to be with you."
Angel considered the man's words. "Maybe, but..."
"No buts, I swear Adam will you ever get over this insecurity, the last time you were like this was right before your wedding."
Angel frowned just a bit, he found that he and this man he portrays have a lot in common. Too much in common. Angel took Harker's advice, obviously breaking up with Buffy had not done either of them any good, he wanted her but his fears still clouded his mind.
"Adam just talk to her, you know she loves you, if she didn't want you she wouldn't put up with you, and believe me that's a hard task." Harker said, smiling
Angel couldn't help but smile.